{"body":[{"id":"29465697554509021","sort":"0","type":1,"role":"29330341922074871","content":"老人家，我給的時候給了大概兩千萬吧，嗨，這個混蛋，前兩天我聽說有人給了五百萬就行了！不過，你最好按照我這個標(biāo)準(zhǔn)來啊！"},{"id":"29465709635099065","sort":"1024","type":1,"role":"29244880124683176","content":"哈，我數(shù)了一下，我兒子給我燒了兩億??！兩億哦！太棒了！"},{"id":"29465789905263222","sort":"2048","type":1,"role":"29330341922074871","content":"瘋狂地被摧毀，才發(fā)現(xiàn)，才發(fā)現(xiàn)我的夢在堅強，在堅強的堡壘！啊，我先唱一句歌！然后，我表示一種感嘆，啊，兩億！"},{"id":"29465799283586861","sort":"3072","type":1,"role":"29244880124683176","content":"對呀，對呀！嘿嘿！"},{"id":"29465803312005439","sort":"4096","type":1,"role":"29330341922074871","content":"老人家，來，我來給你捶捶背！"},{"id":"29465814318986889","sort":"5120","type":1,"role":"29330341922074871","content":"我來給你捏捏腿！這一路上，你肯定特別的類！哈哈，現(xiàn)在是不是覺得消散了你的疲憊！"},{"id":"29465826400109083","sort":"6144","type":1,"role":"29244847658387716","content":"小伙子不懷好心地幫他捶背，啞巴也笑嘻嘻地走過來幫著老吳捶腿、捏背等"},{"id":"29465840375084197","sort":"7168","type":1,"role":"29244880124683176","content":"不懷好心！獻殷勤，我知道我有幾分姿色，你們有什么需求就趕緊地提出來，畢竟過兩天我就投胎了，再想有什么出格的想法都沒有機會了！"},{"id":"29465844655429826","sort":"8192","type":1,"role":"29330341922074871","content":"先容我自言自語一會兒"},{"id":"29465852992506921","sort":"9216","type":1,"role":"29330341922074871","content":"哦！我愛你，姑娘！你在何方！你是不是吃了飯，吃了幾碗，希望你健康"},{"id":"29465859167147587","sort":"10240","type":1,"role":"29330341922074871","content":"好的，我的自言自語結(jié)束了！現(xiàn)在我跟你說正事！"},{"id":"29467068720103863","sort":"11264","type":1,"role":"29330341922074871","content":"老頭你有所不知啊，這黃泉路上，如果給孟婆三千萬就可以免除喝孟婆湯了！可以不忘今生！給輪回官五千萬就可以投個好胎！"},{"id":"29467117580942539","sort":"12288","type":1,"role":"29244880124683176","content":"今生！額，我看，還是忘了比較好吧！"},{"id":"29467132362020723","sort":"13312","type":1,"role":"29330341922074871","content":"是啊是啊，世上的事情就要記不得就不會痛苦了！忘了好，忘了好，哈哈哈，又升了孟婆那的三千萬！"},{"id":"29467138235703613","sort":"14336","type":1,"role":"29244880124683176","content":"你到底想要說什么？"},{"id":"29467201324798482","sort":"15360","type":1,"role":"29330341922074871","content":"您看，您有兩億，給拔舌官兩千萬！輪回官五千萬，還剩下多少？讓我來告訴你，還剩下一億三千萬，我和啞巴和您一樣要忘了今生的，可是誰都想有個好的來生不是嗎？不是嗎？誰又滿意他的今生呢？又有多少人對他的人生全部滿意呢？這樣行嗎？您分給我們一人五千萬，還剩下三千萬您可以在黃泉路上買零食吃！"},{"id":"29467236762089817","sort":"16384","type":1,"role":"29330341922074871","content":"反正死人的錢投了胎也用不到！我說一個題外話，你看咱們這個牢房，我想起活著的時候住的一間出租屋了，你注意到了嗎？只要你把門打開，那么如果有個人路過的話，那么他們就會往你的屋子里瞅一瞅，然后在他們的心里留下他們的評價，但是當(dāng)他們評價好或壞的時候，他們也的確犯了窺探的罪了不是？"},{"id":"29467244547247149","sort":"17408","type":1,"role":"29330341922074871","content":"當(dāng)然你亦可以說這是因為我有暴露的欲望，得了吧！那么，你到底愿不愿意分一些錢給我呢？"},{"id":"29467254497074190","sort":"18432","type":1,"role":"29244880124683176","content":"小伙子啊，這錢嘛，別說是這冥幣了，就算是真錢，我也未必會放在眼里。不過……"},{"id":"29467257181669503","sort":"19456","type":1,"role":"29330341922074871","content":"不過什么呀，您說！"},{"id":"29467288305892619","sort":"20480","type":1,"role":"29244880124683176","content":"不過，明天萬一拔舌官要的不止兩千萬，我要是帶少了，那我可就要受罪了！我要是帶多了，那么要等到那個輪回官萬一再不夠，那對我還是不利的呀！這樣，明天你給我看著錢，要是我沒有被拔舌頭，我就給你。"},{"id":"29467293122660283","sort":"21504","type":1,"role":"29244880124683176","content":"我是說萬一帶多了，人家拔舌官再都給我要完了！"},{"id":"29467325891957872","sort":"22528","type":1,"role":"29330341922074871","content":"老吳，你放心吧，如果不夠的話，那么我就幫你打點那兩位無常，讓他們再給你通融一下，這些都是很好說的??！"},{"id":"29467330454512409","sort":"23552","type":1,"role":"29244880124683176","content":"好，那咱們說好了??！"},{"id":"29467340909068634","sort":"24576","type":1,"role":"29244847658387716","content":"三個人相視而笑，他們對著明天有著美好的希望，對于來生有著十足的信心~"},{"id":"29467357569254540","sort":"25600","type":1,"role":"29244847658387716","content":"第二天，黑白無常將老吳帶到了拔舌頭的地方，老吳被綁了起來，可是老吳不斷地沖著拔舌官眨眼睛、咳嗽！拔舌官心領(lǐng)神會！"},{"id":"29467361848026138","sort":"26624","type":1,"role":"29257148433592612","content":"老吳， 你怎么了？"},{"id":"29467371781104233","sort":"27648","type":1,"role":"29329270345791368","content":"兩位無常啊，就我的經(jīng)驗而言，這個老吳應(yīng)該是得了重型感冒！我看，你們還是先出去吧！"},{"id":"29467374214024983","sort":"28672","type":1,"role":"29329270345791368","content":"省的被傳染！"},{"id":"29467377956823579","sort":"29696","type":1,"role":"29244847658387716","content":"拔舌官補充地說道！"},{"id":"29468125007745910","sort":"30720","type":1,"role":"29244847658387716","content":"白無常一聽拔舌官這么說，連忙拿出了倆口罩"},{"id":"29468127693172442","sort":"31744","type":1,"role":"29280372121104849","content":"這不就行了！@拔舌官"},{"id":"29468134958551961","sort":"32768","type":1,"role":"29244847658387716","content":"拔舌官的臉上明顯出現(xiàn)了厭惡"},{"id":"29468176301844280","sort":"33792","type":1,"role":"29257148433592612","content":"拔舌官啊，你就不要客氣了，都是自家兄弟嘛！是的，我們知道你平時銷售舌頭，然后依靠提成可以每個月月入上萬！可是，我告訴你吧，我并不喜歡，那又怎么樣呢？我現(xiàn)在喜歡的職業(yè)就是運送人的靈魂，并且可以得知他們的一生，我覺得這件事情有意思極了！我記得你曾經(jīng)也說過嘛！"},{"id":"29468194808843235","sort":"34816","type":1,"role":"29257148433592612","content":"一顆竹子最初只長了三厘米！用了一年的時間，可是他在接下來的幾年，每年以十五米的速度生長，最終長成了一萬米！你說過的！"},{"id":"29468197778791266","sort":"35840","type":1,"role":"29329270345791368","content":"??！"},{"id":"29468228920715001","sort":"36864","type":1,"role":"29257148433592612","content":"拔舌官啊，你就不要客氣了！我們要是走了，那么，就沒有人幫助你撬開老吳的嘴巴，這樣的話，你還怎么拔舌頭呢？萬一被他咬著了，你還要打狂犬疫苗的，我知道你們這些住在地府政治中心的人都比較注重個人的衛(wèi)生！可是你千萬不要搞錯了，如果沒有我們這些從外地來的人，你們這么小的地方，這么點兒人怎么"},{"id":"29468241521884202","sort":"37888","type":1,"role":"29257148433592612","content":"可能將地府建設(shè)的這么繁華呢？你不要搞錯了！你沒有注意到一件事情嗎？我們顯得更加地職業(yè)化，像那么一回事情。而你呢！"},{"id":"29468262194215140","sort":"38912","type":1,"role":"29257148433592612","content":"行了，不要給我遞煙了！呵，這么優(yōu)秀的文化，怎么在當(dāng)著人的面的時候就沒有那么值得稱贊呢？"},{"id":"29468275617678684","sort":"39936","type":1,"role":"29244847658387716","content":"老吳以懺悔般的語氣說著他的話，他的話聽的人都會流出眼淚的，流出一大堆的眼淚！"},{"id":"29468292782538674","sort":"40960","type":1,"role":"29244880124683176","content":"二位無常，你們不用擔(dān)心。我自知我罪孽深重，而對于一個罪孽深重的人來說，受懲罰對我來說就是一種救贖！我樂意接受最令人感到疼痛的拔舌頭！"},{"id":"29468338974339569","sort":"41984","type":1,"role":"29244847658387716","content":"說完，老吳把舌頭伸了出來，就好像一個被砍頭的人把頭伸進鍘刀那樣的堅定"},{"id":"29468356155945508","sort":"43008","type":1,"role":"29329270345791368","content":"嘿嘿，嘿嘿，嘿嘿，嘿嘿"},{"id":"29468358823924911","sort":"44032","type":1,"role":"29244847658387716","content":"拔舌官笑著"},{"id":"29468367431293163","sort":"45056","type":1,"role":"29244847658387716","content":"而白無常這個多愁善感的鬼差，他已經(jīng)留出了眼淚了，多么地情緒化！"},{"id":"29468385418438923","sort":"46080","type":1,"role":"29280372121104849","content":"這個人自知有罪，啊，有多少人不知道自己有罪啊，連承認(rèn)也不承認(rèn)的人啊！可是，老吳呢！他竟然承認(rèn)呢！看來人間還是很正能量的嘛！我愛老吳。"},{"id":"29468442316054916","sort":"47104","type":1,"role":"29244847658387716","content":"說罷，黑白無常感動地哭哭啼啼離開了拔舌間，緊接著，一聲殺豬般的嚎叫從里面?zhèn)鱽?。一條血淋淋的舌頭被丟出了門外，二位無常一看，那個淚水就更加地流了！"},{"id":"29468445268983344","sort":"48128","type":1,"role":"29257148433592612","content":"哦！偉人！偉人！"},{"id":"29468449027878856","sort":"49152","type":1,"role":"29280372121104849","content":"哦！萬歲！萬歲！這樣的人應(yīng)該永生！"},{"id":"29468456259523619","sort":"50176","type":1,"role":"29244847658387716","content":"牢房內(nèi)的小伙子也顯然聽到了那聲慘叫！有些詫異！"},{"id":"29468458424021502","sort":"51200","type":1,"role":"29330341922074871","content":"??？不會吧"},{"id":"29468472904092349","sort":"52224","type":1,"role":"29244847658387716","content":"不一會兒，黑白無常將老吳押來，只見老吳面容憔悴！雙手捂著嘴巴！眼神里透露著悲傷！"},{"id":"29468474799808298","sort":"53248","type":1,"role":"29257148433592612","content":"進去！"},{"id":"29468493307804828","sort":"54272","type":1,"role":"29244847658387716","content":"老吳被狠狠推進了牢里，兩位無常的神情完全不像之前在拔舌官那里那樣感動，也許他們懂得工作和私人感情是要分開的！"},{"id":"29468718513935646","sort":"55296","type":1,"role":"29244847658387716","content":"小伙走進老吳，心疼極了。他也很歉疚。"},{"id":"29468752876533616","sort":"56320","type":1,"role":"29330341922074871","content":"老吳，在這種緊要的關(guān)頭，我依然還是想跟您說一句題外話。您知道嗎？在我生前，有人用金錢來誘惑我，許諾給我許多東西！他們非要要我去買奔馳，可是我就是喜歡別克，那種藍(lán)色的別克商務(wù)車型，一直都讓我覺得很好看！我就愛！他們不懂！以為我買不起呢！就像給我一份一萬元一個月的工作，我并不喜歡，"},{"id":"29468759319725498","sort":"57344","type":1,"role":"29330341922074871","content":"一萬！你倒是給我開個五六萬的，以為那又多么了不起！"},{"id":"29468786182605772","sort":"58368","type":1,"role":"29330341922074871","content":"好了，我的題外話說完了。我要跟您說抱歉。您知道我為什么要跟您說題外話，那是因為我想讓您的情緒有一點轉(zhuǎn)移，這樣您就不會太過于責(zé)怪我。您知道的，這個事情出現(xiàn)的很突然，我完全沒有想到你真的會被拔舌頭！要知道，這種買賣可是他們的額外收入啊，無論多少，當(dāng)然也不能過少，可是有總比沒有好吧！"},{"id":"29468797458081503","sort":"59392","type":1,"role":"29330341922074871","content":"可是，我沒想到你真的被拔舌頭！一定很痛苦！不過，沒事的，反正咱們馬上就要投胎了，我們的人生就要改變了，你不要太難過，也不要怪我了"},{"id":"29469755761940987","sort":"60416","type":1,"role":"29244880124683176","content":"你之前是在做銷售嗎？"},{"id":"29469758463281381","sort":"61440","type":1,"role":"29244880124683176","content":"月薪一萬一月是嗎？"},{"id":"29469762743475008","sort":"62464","type":1,"role":"29330341922074871","content":"我先是在一個廠子做的事！"},{"id":"29469782893912037","sort":"63488","type":1,"role":"29244880124683176","content":"哇喲！從一個廠子里打掃五千平方米廠房、月入只有一千三的打工小弟，到最后成了一個月入一萬的高級銷售！你丫真厲害！"},{"id":"29469786083293837","sort":"64512","type":1,"role":"29244880124683176","content":"太勵志了！燃爆了！"},{"id":"29469815899817527","sort":"65536","type":1,"role":"29330341922074871","content":"哎呀，你都不知道有多少人因為跟我比較而搞得他們的人生走進了悲劇，他們就像看起來比我強一些鋌而走險，不惜給人舔甲溝炎里頭的膿水，就是為了見到我的時候看起來比我好。太悲劇了！不過，你聽誰說的，你真是會扯犢子！??！等會兒，你會說話！"},{"id":"29469823416055904","sort":"66560","type":1,"role":"29330341922074871","content":"怎么一回事？"},{"id":"29469847830625985","sort":"67584","type":1,"role":"29244880124683176","content":"哈哈哈，是這樣的。我啊，照你說的，給了拔舌官兩千萬，他就想了個辦法，把一只狗給殺了！還叫我大聲叫，那只狗真是慘，先是被他用大棒子敲死，又剪掉了舌頭扔了出去！??！太慘了！"},{"id":"29469852394411685","sort":"68608","type":1,"role":"29330341922074871","content":"那，錢？我們能分嗎？"},{"id":"29469857779500229","sort":"69632","type":1,"role":"29244880124683176","content":"哈哈哈，哪能不分?。∫蝗宋迩f，去吧！"},{"id":"29469867444195849","sort":"70656","type":1,"role":"29244847658387716","content":"說著，二人趕忙跑去分錢"},{"id":"29469876286954854","sort":"71680","type":1,"role":"29257148433592612","content":"快走！磨磨蹭蹭的！"},{"id":"29469892127201679","sort":"72704","type":1,"role":"29244847658387716","content":"就在他們分錢，老吳高興得捋舌頭的時候，黑無常的聲音從外頭傳來，三人都很好奇！"},{"id":"29469895095957833","sort":"73728","type":1,"role":"29257148433592612","content":"老太婆！快點，別耍滑頭！"}],"sentencecount":73}